Part 6: Being ready is to be prepared...

Hi... hope those who are reading to this can take in the long long and long entry... Heck its what I do for a living and uh... studying...
Anyway... there is still a long way to tell my story...
Though to tell you the truth...I did not type everything into this blog here... only the ones that really needed to be told...

It was a Wednesday and Miles and I got closer by the day... The more we hang out together... the more I understand him... Actually he is no different to any of us here... He is still human... yet the only thing that is messed up is his fondness for boys... I don't know why... and Sometimes I did not want to now why... But curiosity always is my best friend and worst foe...

We were walking a long the corridor of Block 'C', Miles was trying to get back to his class and I tried to go back to mine... when all of a sudden... "Hey Miles, why do you choose boys over girls? Haven't you gone out with a girl before? Your looks and charm can really reel in more than a dozen girls, you know that..."

He just kept on walking slowly this time and stopped between the walk way from Block 'C' to Block 'B'. He answered me smilingly and without guilt. "Yes, I know that... and believe it or not I've been there and done that... and I know between girls and boys there is a very large gap in the middle..."

He stopped his speech in mid way and walked down the stairs to his class in Block 'A'. I was so...you know how it feels when some one just let things left unfinished... So I ran after him and ask what gives? And he said nothing and kept on going...what was up with his sudden mood swing??? And I had to pull him in the arm to make him stop and face me...

He did...finally..."I'm...I'm... Sorry... It's just somethings I still can't forget and when it does pass through my mind, it hurts like hell...sorry..."

"Hey, it's OK...thought I said something wrong just now..."

"Well, you actually did...in fact...But I'm not mad at you...just mad at me about the past..."

"Well, that's where I come in...tell me then...what is the thing that you can't forget?"

"Hmmm, it's a long story... and recess is over...we got class..."

"Never mind that...let's just cut class..."

"What?"

"You know... skip class... we go somewhere else..."

"Hmmm, interesting... okay I'm with you... where to?"

"The library..."

"Wow...that sound so adventurous...well I'm still with you...besides its a boring class right now..."

So we went back the same way to Block 'C' where the school library was...its a very nice place to hide actually...the teachers would never find you here...because it's the last place they will think of...

So we sat at the farthest part of the library at the back near the corner where they pile up the books that need to be 'replaced'

"Okay here we are...shoot..."

"Wow, this is a nice place... okay...where was I? Oh yeah, why I turned sour. Well, I did say that I agree with you that I could reel in more than a dozen girls if I wanted to..."

"I did...before I became like this..." And he was quiet again. It seems that he has some internal battle going on... so I decided to take the steer...

"Wait, you were not like this before? Sorry if its digging into personal stuff but I wanna know more...you were straight??"

"As a matter of fact yes... and no..." and he half smiled to himself and to me.

"Then you're a bisexual?"

"Hell no! Bisexuals are to most unfaithful."

"Then?"

"I was born homo but I did not realized it and would have remained straight only if... well where should I begin? Hmmm Maybe I should answer the first question you asked...is that okay?"

"Fine with me. Just as long as you'd talk..."

"Why I choose boys over girls? the answer's simple... it's the understanding part..."

"What? You don't understand girls?"

"No...they don't understand me... no...they don't WANT TO understand me... yeah, that's it..."

"Hmmm...maybe you don't give them a chance?"

"I gave them all the chance they want... the problem is they are just too shallow minded."

"What happened actually?"

"Well, if you must know, it doesn't matter where you are they are all the same... be it here or overseas..."

"You've been over seas?"

"Uh uh...I didn't told you that?"

"No."

"Sorry, I usually don't like to tell where I've been... it's like showing off... Don't like it... So yeah, I've been to the West... France and UK actually... not by my own free will if that is what you want to know... My parents are teachers... my mom, who is very ambitious decided to further her studies abroad... my dad agreed but he did want to join in the 'fun'... so he accompanies my mom there and brought the whole family along!"

"Wow...interesting..."

"Yeah, but the one thing more interesting is that I don't know one word of English back then...I'm from Kelantan if you want to really know...just a simple boy in the suburbs..."

"Now, that takes the cake... continue please..."

"Okay, now where was I? Oh about girls... once a girl sees a cute face or even a good looking one... they'll just fall for you no questions asked... and they'll start ASSUMING who the hunk is without even asking up front... like I said... they're shallow... They only look on the outside... to make things worst... when they start to know the guy they adore doesn't fit with their fantasy guy... they'll start to want the guy to change according to their liking...ironic isn't it?"

"Yeah, you got that point right... it is ironic when actually you are in love with your own fantasy not with the person you are in a relationship with..."


"So I did had a girl before... two actually... at different times that is... the first was before I went to France...and the other was when I am in France... yet they are just the same..."

"Okay... what is the same?"

"Like just what I've said... They are OK actually but when they start to get to really know you...they'll start to suggest you to change to their liking... I mean why do you have to do that???"

"Maybe they have a good reason..."

"You bet they do... but I don't think so... because I've already asked why... and you know what they answered?"

"What?"

"They answered: 'It's because I want you to...' and 'I like it better when you do or don't...'. Don't believe me? Try it with your girlfriend then..."

"I don't have a girlfriend..."

"You don't? Interesting... why not? Even with your looks I don't even stand a chance... you'll sweep all the girls from all the boys in school. Don't mistaken that line... it's just a compliment."

"Thanks, nice compliment, well if you wanna know... before you moved here, I did had a few relationships... four actually... none seem to stay true..."

"Oh, is it something like I said just now?"

"No, it's different... these girls... man... they are not only shallow. They're selfish as well."

"Hmmm?"

"Well, the first just wanted sex... but we were like in form 1 but my friends all knew about her... some had a taste of her too... she wanted me so she can have sex with me and then she'll look for another one..."

"Did you accept that invitation?"

"No. After all the boys she slept with... I broke up with her after she asked me to 'play' with her..."

"So brave..."

"Really? She said I was a coward... I chickened out..."

"What about the others? You said you coupled 4 times..."

"The second just wanted my money, the third wants to get my fame... which she did and then she left me for the guy she actually liked and the fourth is a control freak. She would even control my breathing, when and how, if she only could..."


"Hehe...the fourth is just like mine... as well as the others... you see, they are all the same..."

"Certainly nothing is the same forever, right?"

"Maybe. But to find something that is different in a girl is like to find a difference between each fishes in a school... they are even known to Allah to have ONE MIND and NINE DESIRES..."

"Maybe. Maybe not. But you do have a point with the increasing number of females their quality declines... thats the equation of quantity and quality..."

"Well at least some of us here knows their math... so it's like that... A girl does those thing but a boy doesn't... from what I've experienced... Allah said the men have one desire and nine minds... so when a man is in love he is really in love..."

And so Miles and I did talk about a lot of things in that library and to write it all down could take sometime for to do as I can't really remember fully what we talk about. But what I really remember about was what happened after the talk... so tune in to Part 7: Book of Knowledge...